I give myself several days off because of one game. Human's curiosity is horrible strong. I can not sleep well until I can see the final ending. The game is about one three men team in Los Santos. They are the bad people who rob the bank ,kill people and steal things. But this game's world is amazing which have created us one free place to do things we do not dare to do. It is funny. But I heard a lot of voice against this game because people think it have bad influence for the young kid. I also believe it is a game just for the people grown up. Because the  kids can not tell what is right and what is wrong. But in the game when you rob the bank and attack on some body. You would be chased by the policeman. Most of the time, you would get shot by the police. Then you would lose a lot of money. But the kids are enjoying the exciting moment. But they do not realize what is wrong with these behaves. As a grown up,I do not suggest the kids play these games. This is why the games have a level. 

As a 80's born people, I know the magic of the game have attracted a lot of people. I call it fallen days because during that time I am so stuck with the games.It is like one kind drug addiction make you can not pull yourself out. 

Now I have to tell myself to wake up and stop playing the games from today. Because it is the best to work now. We have to pay the responsibility to the family. We have the kid to raise. And we have to be careful with our life.

There is something flied into my mother's eyes. She ask me to find if it get out. But when take a close to her face. I was a llittle shocked by her face. The wrinkles covered all over her face. She is not the one she used to be in my memory. She have changed so much.

The time is one heartless sculptor. Its work is on the old people's faes. Make them look older. But it is also one warning for the time. They ask us to treat the family better. There isn't much time to be a good son. Now when I was checking her eyes. These things come up with my mind and make me want to cry. Maybe it is too sensitive. But the great difference make me shock. I never realize she is becoming older and older day by day. The time would never stop. 

I feel sorry for yelling at her. Sometimes when I am busy.  I feel not happy to explain too much. I know she is trying to understand my life. But I am just too careless for her cares. The love between the family is the greatest . But what I have done with them is not nice to be a son. In 5 minutes I have realized what is wrong with me. When looking at the old pictures of my childhood. They do not care what how naughty I was. They would spend a lot of money on my education and daily life. I believe when you are grown up and have the ability, It is the time to repay them. Stay with the parents for a while every day. Listen to them carefully and be nice to them. Be patient with your old parents. 

I should say sorry to parents. From now on I am going to be a good son like they used to be a good parents.

I complain about the boring normal life. Everyday when I am awake,I would play the phone games for half an hour. And then eat the breakfast . The blanket would be through into the corner of the bed-I never make up my bed. Then I turn the computer on. I would read some news and drink of cup tea. At the time around 10, I would start my work on the computer.

This is another normal day. My friends admire me because I can work at home. There is no need to take the crowd bus or suffer in the traffic jam while driving a car. But it is just normal for me. I start to think that maybe people just do not find their wonderful parts of their normal lives. If I have to take the bus to the work every day. I would enjoy walking on the street with the morning air. If I am working outdoor. I would enjoy breathing the air of freedom. But every day I am locked at home. In the other side , people admire me because I am totally free at home. It is free to take a bath at any time of the day. You can just wear a underwear while you are working. No one would judge your look. And it is a nightmare to make a decision on what to wear for working. We just can not tell the better parts of our normal life. So we may change some of our views of the normal life. Or do something to make this normal life wonderful. 

Then I deciside to get up 1 hour earlier than usual. I do some sports in the yard downstairs. After going back home I take a morning bath. That feels great. Maybe some people do not have the time like me. But when you are after work , you can also enjoy your free time. It is easy to change if you have made a decision. 

The technology have changed our daily life. Especially these years, the tech is moving forward with the giant step. The things around us have changed a lot. Such as the phone. The phone in our pocket which we call it as the cellphone. Now it is called smart phone. I do not realize when did it start. But now when you are walking on the street. Almost 100% people are using the smart phone. They can download the useful apps from the apps market. I believe this have created a new way of using the cellphone. There is no buttons on the phone. Instead people use their fingeres slide on the phone to control the phone. It is a great step on the phone technology. However as the phone is widely used among us, there is also some trouble with phone.It is the phone addiction. I do not know when to start. I need to check out my phone every 15 minutes. Once when I am free, I would side on the phone to check some messages or news. And the apps keep pushing the news on our phone. Most of us even can not not focus on the job. The phone is the thing they spend their most of the time on. It is a widely seen situation. We do not realize when it start. People are having the fun when using the phone. But they need to know, the phone is just one tool in our daily life. We should not lose our life style when using the phone. So how can we protect us from the phone addiction. In my view, the phone is one contact tool in our daily life. So we have to keep it around. But we should control the time for using it. We can arrange a period of time to play the phone for half one hour one day. Then we should leave the phone alone and keep working or do something else. I also suggest we should have the right to ban the news push from the app. We can not control our curiousity. So we should own the right to stop them sending the messages.

Yesterday I have my hair cut by myself. Most people can not believe it becauset they think it is impossible for a man to cut his own hair. I do not think that would happen too, until I have made it by myself. All I need is the electric hair clipper. It is one useful tool for cutting the hair. For the man, it is one perfect way to design your own hair style. And it also take risks. Because I have just have all my hair cut. 

Sometimes we would make mistakes because we can not handle the hair right. Yesteday I have made a mistake. And I am not satisfied with the head skin situation . So I have all my hair cut and start to take care of the skin on my head. What I want with the hair style is some kinds of basic look with a clean cut. But soon I have found I have a big head and the hair quality is bad. So I need to have them all cut to start control the quality of the hair. It is one long way to go . But I would like to have a try. 

Our body is like one extremely complex machine. They work together to make it work perfectly. What I want is the perfect status with the health and look. That need a concerntrate heart but if you can make it, that would bring you a lot of good feelings. When you are improving in your health situation that would make you feel the difference. And I would start the improvement on my hair.It is needed to have a perect status when you arrive at home. Having all my hair cut is a sign of a fresh start. It is the beginning of a new start of the life. Try to make it this month. 

Yesterday mother have made me a telephone call to tell me about some news about the food health. She said it is not safe to eat outside the fast food store,. It was not a latest news which I have heard about it before. And I feel boring for that. Then I told her I was very busy with the job. Her voice stuck for a while. I feel she is feeling sad for that. But I have to let her get used to this. Because one day I would leave her. I can not live under her hood for all my life time. I am ready to go. 

There are a lot of people who is alone in this city. They are also the sons and daughters of their parents. But she always said she worry about me. And she said she can not leave me alone in this city. She worries if something have happened to me there is no one can take care of me. But when will this  have an end? I get into your city and I am always under the protection of the parents. Sometimes when I am going to some place strange I neeed mother to go with me. Now I am an adult and I am getting a family soon. So when I can get out of this house all by myself ? I think my life is twisted. I can not blame it to my parents. But I have to learn to get a new life without them. That is why I ask them to go back to the hometown. They are old and they are not fit for work any more. So it is the best to send them back home. I do not want to move back to that city. Even though the hometown seems to be the most important thing. But seems be myself is more important than many things. I should live alone for a long time to train myself. 

I know mother would be sad about it. But I have to do this to make myself to be a man who can handle things all by myself. I can not live like a kid. 

In next few days I would be all alone in this city. The city is filled with the loneliness. But it is better. I do not know when to start I would prefer to be alone. I hate staying with the family. It is happy to stay with the family. But I have found I can not focus on my job while staying with the family. We keep talking about the useless things. They always tell me the news I have already known from the internet. 

The love of the family is pure. But sometimes I doubt about the relationship. All people have some kinds of selfish thoughts. Mother ask me to give her 1000 bucks every month. And she do not understand my stress. There are so many dreams that haven't come true. But here comes more stress. Would my life be always sufering? I am wondering. People have to work hard all these days. The money have changed people a lot. The more money they make, the more they want. No one would accept their normal life. But now what happened to us?

When we are surfing on the internet, The rich people show out their luxury life style. They own their own boat, their nice car, their lovely ladies. The giant necklace made of gold show us how rich they are. But while we are watching this, that have already destoroyed our views of the happy life. The differentce make us feel more disappionted with our normal life. We are chasing after their life style. But most of us can not make it true. It is sad and also make our life become pointless. 

Family or the future, that is a quetsion. When will we keep these two things a ba;ance?

It is taught we should learn to forgive. This one kind kind way to treat the life. But how can we live without all these hate and anger inside our mind. Seems there are so many things are influencing us. They are happening among our life. And we can not control the life. Seems the fate have arranged everything. Now I am facing one of my greatest problems in my life. In 15 days this whole house would be empty. Mother and father are moving back to the hometown. It seems a good news because I finally have my own space. But that remind the days when I was living at the old house. There is no one to talk with me. I have become one kind person who is out of mind who talk with myself one day. It was not the perfect life which I used to think of . But it make me feel free. Now I hate to stay with the family because of something. I am not happy with everything. But now I am feeling I have lost myself in this kind life. I do not know what is the love. I am confused with the relationship with the whole family. I have become one selfish person who is just thinking of myself all day long. It is just like this. The life should be filled with passion. But for me. why I think my life is all dark for the future. The true worries about the future make me feel worried. I do not know how to make it right. And now I am even more confusing with the family. Everything is not what I think before. And everything is trying to destroy me. I may never forgive myself for all these life. I am being a selfish person. I am so sick of myself.