If there is one kind magic can erase the memory it would be nice. Because sometime the memory have the sweet side but sometimes it would destroy your whole life. And like the love. Sometime can make you live in suffering. And now it is not like before any more. She is trying to be a princess. And she is not beautiful. But I just can not forget. I have tried the best. But it is just so hard to make myself feel comfort any more. I start to be afraid of talk with her. And I am trying to make myself become as cold as I can. But I just can not quit. It is so hard.

So I would like one kind magic can erase the memory. All kinds of memory have different functions. After sleeping for three hours. I am still sitting here like one lost puppy.I do not know where to go. I do not know who to talk. And I just feel the pain in my eyes and the pain in my heart. I want to make myself straighten up by listening to the music .But it does not work. She suppose to talk with me. But today she still not online. Maybe she have some one love already. And she just can not find a chance to be with him. And I am just one tool while feeling lonely. It is really needed to do something to make myself know about the real life. Everything is clear to me. But I do not have any choices for this life any more. I have to make myself be tough. I have to wake up for all these things.

Listening to the classic music. And thinking of someone I know. I start to miss myself in this kind relationship. But I never know what she is thinking of me. Maybe I can just be one partner while feeling lonely. And I am just one person who used to happened to her life maybe. I am just as small as one sand. Maybe I do not have any kind of weight for me. But she is just talking with me.So I doubt about myself for so long. The pain in my eyes and many other things keep bothering me. I am not sure if this is right. I am just feeling I am one person do not have a soul. Live for love ,and sometime I also believe the love would destroy everything. I do not know why I am born to be so dark .Because usually I think the future have no sunshine. I do not have the stable life. So I am trying to live it with the sunshine. But most of the time I do not know if there is the sunshine if choosing this way.

I am leaving this city. But this city is making me start to want to stay just for one person. She is not beautiful . But she have the nice voice. I start to think of the old movie 500 days with summer. Maybe she is my summer, but I truly wish would like to stay with the summer for my life. I can not lose myself for her. But I just do not know what to talk with her.

And now something is making me crazy. The love inside me making feel like to shut down all things to let me stay with her. I am just this kind person who is crazy for the love.Like the designs of hba hoodie.This is one cool feeling inside me. 

I think she would be my girlfriend. But I am not that kind magician can see through the heart. And after so many days I feel the slightly warm inside my heart. And seems someone have made it burn again. And it is like one wild fire inside me. I thought she should also have the same feeling. But sometime there is something deep inside me. It isn't the feeling of the happiness of the love. It is about the pain. In the past this black cloud is always over my head. I can feel it is going to rain. Because I am so afraid of loss for others. And now I am playing the music of Kill Bill . It is playing one sad music like the weather in the autumn. There is no sun over the head. And there would be a long rain season at this time of the year. I do not feel happy while get my new pair of shoes. But I start to think of the future. Maybe I can live with her some day. But it would be a long story. I have been away from the normal life for so long. I want to enjoy the couple days with the girls. I do not want to be single any more. It is all about the love and loneliness. I would like to enjoy the sunhine and the travel with the girl friend. I am right on the way. I am trying the best to make it become wonderful. 

Twisted nevous sometime make people feel mad. Because it is like one cat crawl on your heart. Pain but you even can not touch. I love this music. And then it is another day. I would like to get the love. Because I am enjoying the love.

Today it is rainy outside. And I can feel the autumn is coming. And the hot weather have gone for a long time. But I truly wish to stay in the time full of the sunshine. Because each time while it is getting cold the sunshine here would also be very few. I hate the clouds because this kind weather would make me feel mad. And since at the school time I can get the feeling while the weather is getting cold. The emotion on me would change a lot. Because the night is getting dark too early. And the crazy young time make me miss. I would spend whole day time on the internet club and then playing the games all day long. After that I would want to cry because I just can not control. In fact I spend most of the high school time like that. And also make me become one of the losers at the school. Go dancing in the club, drink the wine , use the money in crappy way. And it make my so called youth full of the passion and also make me feel mad with it. I would like to forget those time because nowadays I usually feel regret. At that time being bad seems honor for me. It is one way to show the courage to quarrel with the teacher. But now you would just treat it as one rude and impolite activity because you never know which is more important and which is deserve to respect. 

This is the life should be like. Always full of the stories in the past in your memory. And I keep listening the old music. And I keep my memory inside my mind to warn myself do not walk on the old road any more. I am enjoying this kind life. And I would like to keep fighting and fighting. 

After several days hard working. I start to become numb indeed. All because of this kind life make me can not find a new dream for myself. I start to losing the control . I dreamed I have a lover. I want to spend the rest of the life with her. And I do not have any kinds willing for works. I know it is quite out of the way. But I just keep walking on this way for more than 2 months already. I have kept this way just like one horror way. Watching the movies, go out and travel with other people. And now it is just making me feel regret and I have to make up my new dream. And this dream have to make me have the strength to work all day long. I can not live the life in that waste way. And I have to make myself know what to do in future. And this is my life should be like. One day I would make done one day. This kind life would be fantasy. This kind life would make me know the meaning of the life.

I need this new dream. And the new dream would make me know the truth for my life. I would make it in that glory way. I would try to make the dream like one dream machine come for me. I have to end up that kind wired life. And I would enjoy the pain of the life. I would enjoy the experience chasing the dreams. All these things come out of me. And I speak it out. And I must obey the rules. And keep fighting and keep fighting. Enjoy the style of 40oz nyc snapback cool designs withe amaizng signature. I would make it fantasy.

About one old song remind my memory in the past. We used to sit together and talking about all kinds of music. But now you even never replied my messages. Whatever when you think of me. I am feeling disappionted for this status. But whatever you think .This kind life is not the one I wait. But I think one day I would make you feel regret for that. You are just too proud and one day you would feel you are wrong. I wish you can stand at your corner looking at me with your shame. And maybe one day we should never be together. You are just some people I used to know. And now you are just nothing for me. I deleted you from my friends list. And I think I should arrange one new order for my world. And this is what I have been thinking of my life. And then one day I would feel much better.
The god used to give me one unstable life. But now it give me the strength to make it stable. I can not live in that way any more. I have to make my new world become fantasy and full of the nice dreams I used to own. That is my final dream. I have to get away from the poor life. I can not stand for the time I do not have the money to use any more. I have to make the family live in the right way but not always suffering all the time. This is the aim I have set for me. I would drive one perfect car right at your door and make you know I am successful one for this new life. I am marching on for the good life. And this is not bad meets evil. This is the dream of one boy full of the passion for the life.

I am not one good man because I am always selfish for my life. I hate being like one slave. And there are just no choices for my life. I want to find my out of my cage. And being like one so called slave and work for my life. Life is just like one big gamble. Every day you put the bet on the gamble. It is the time and the time for you is limited always. So when your bet out you are gone to the heaven. It is all about the life style. And then after seeing the truth you would find that you are truly one gambler in the game. And every day you are trying to tell which bet you would like to take. And it is just like horrible game you have ever had. And this is the true life.

Any way I am just trying to tell the truth of the life. And no matter how would you think of me. I am just trying to tell my views for the life. Gamble full of the risk and unexpected results. All kinds of dreams for our future. And all kinds of cool life style. It is just making us fell down like the fallen angel. We need some holy life style. But the truth of the life is disgusting. We hate ourselves. But we have to live. We do not have the courage to abandon all kinds of things. And this is my life. I am trying to win.