Music can make me fortget many things, those things who usually would mess up my thought. ANd now living in this kind life I am feeling wondering what kind of life should I live. It is my life but not chosen by myself. I haven't run fast for a long time. Because most people would stare at the adult who is running. How I wish I can because one little kid and then I can do anything that I want. 

Parents also have the trouble. And I am mad with this. Any way they are still the parents and now what happened to all these people who are trying to pull your soul down .And then I am tired of all these things. But is there any other choice. I have to face all these things and it is messing up my mind. I want to get away but I am just too naive for all these things. They are all trying to bring me these throubles making me mad with all these things. I am too tired for all these things. Yesterday I sleep very late in the night. I hate what they are talking about. All those small things can lead him become like this. I truly the god is creating the trouble for him just to let him pay back what he have done. He would not be happy all the time because they are leading this kind life for them .And finally you would understand what I am saying.

Inspired or feeling I am just weired and I can not afford house rent, i can not buy myself one piece of crooks and castles snapback as one gift for my brother. And all these things are tragedies. I have to make it all over from now on.

Suddenly I recognize one summer I go to one studio to learn the sketch. At that time i was amazed by the simple line can create one perfect picture with the shadows .I like the shadows because those shadows can make you feel the light. The vintage saying is where is the light always have the shadows.

I drawed many things . I like the picture from the magazine. Those pictures make me have the new thoughts and new hobby in my life. And it is the time to sketch something I like. So I have done it. 

I am not good at handling the details. In fact most of the time the sketch is some kinds of wasting the time. Lonely time is suffering for me. So I have to look for something I can do. So I turn this hobby own.

More and mnore things are filled in my time. So nowadays I do not have much time for that any more. The pain have gone. I am feeling much better.

By the way I am going to shopping tomorrow considering what kinds good stuff I should buy. Maybe I need one chrome hearts clothing or something can bring me the power of the rock. The fashion is always in my mind. I need it all the time.

As my work I am have to get away from home. And in fact about several years ago this kind life already start. However I am that kind childish adult. I want to stay with the whole family. Because think about about your life. In fact we do not have too much time to stay with the family. For the rest you have 30 years and one week you go and see your parents. You can only get 48 times one year and they are the ones who used to give birth to you and we should learn to thank the people who have raised you and I think the 48 times on year would never be enough. Until now I do not have a girl friend. However I am not worrying about it because I am looking forward to get enough fortune that means I can get the girl friend by that time. However now we haven't made it. So I have to wait. It is kind of like one practice in my life to make myself have the honor for the fortune I have ever made. This kind life is trying to push me to forward to get more what I want.

Parents is still far away from my workplace.How I wish I can eat the delicious food made by mother and how I wish we can talk about the jokes all day and watch the TV. I do not care what is shown on TV in fact I just want to stay with the family. However it all depend on me. I should have to work harder and harder all day to make the dream come true for me.

I do not care about the clothing I wear. I do not care if you are wearing my favorite last kings snapback. All I want to is changing this situation and raise my kingdom which I live what I want to live.

I am one great Jay-Z's fans. In fact about the Hip Hopers , Jay-Z usually was the best of all kinds of rap music. From the vinatge family living with the Hip Hop his works for the music standing on the front. And also about the year 2006 the Crooks and Castles clothing released from him. And his signature hands shape with the two hands inside out standing the most effective look of the hip hop signature.Crooks and Castles seems have the most sense for the Medusa . Many of their designs you can see the Medusa. This is a beautiful woman of tragedy and I feel it is just too sad to become one woman to a monster and she even can not see any man and people any more and make him have to live the rest of the life so lonely. And that is why so many people like her looks because it is the beauty and the evil monster mixture and ost of the people think she is cruel. However we also have to know she is tearing the great pain in her life and when these pain turn into the hate. She have to become this kind monster. Anyway it is just one tale but for her I show pity on her. And maybe that is the reason why Crooks and Castles make her show a lot in their designs. It is just the pity for this beautiful woman. And we should show love to this poor woman who is suffering.

Sitting here I start to think of a lot of things. The people around me and many other things which can make me feel the moving moment in my life. We have to make the whole world have the love.

The 500 days in the movie make myself remind the time which I stay with her. I am such one wasted that I still can not forget her but is there any way to choose? I am all by myself in this empty house where I can not find any space for the future and then this is my way of living and now half hours have passed and I did not do anything. I would never be the best and I have been waiting for so long. The god do not open that door for me and I would try to live the pure life and then I would know which way should I choose. So many days have passed already and I can not forget her. I am wasted indeed.

Maybe I should find someone to replace her. Because I know this kind life is suffering. 

Any way I am still living in this world. And I should face the truth in my life. And once when I achieved the goal I can go back to the hometown. So I have to make it come true as soon as possible. Because that is the life style I want . That is my life style which I want the most.