Hope is the reason why we are living. I hope to give my family and myself the best life. I do not want to make my children live under the people's laughter. 

When I was a young boy in the middle school .Some of the classmates bully on me. They throw something on me while at class and they never make me stay focus on the class and the teacher never stop them. I am angry just because I do not have a rich family and the teachers look down on me. But I was so weak. What can I do? I just keep crying in my bed. One girl I used to like at that time see me sitting in front of the small store of my mom. And I know I am totally screw up. I am sad and cry in my bed for hours. Parents never understand me. I have a terrible childhood especially in the middle school time. And those things never make me become one worse person. What I have to do is bring the honor back by using my hands. I can not give up just because I can not be the one I used to be. I am afraid of living my poor life again. It is my  nightmare. I should never be the one I hate to be.

My hands is the only way to change the life. I work like buliding one great house of mine. Each bricks and each sand is created by myself. I have to make my hope come true. They are the reason why I am fighting and never stop. 

I get away from those bad memory and I should never pick it up again. Thousands miles away, I am building my dreams again. 

The hot weather seems would never change these days. Summer should be like a summer and the weather get as hot as it can be. I can smell the hot air in my nose under the sunshine. Any way I have to work at home. I am very glad I do not need to get out of this room. I know most people are sweating while I am standing right behind my windows and watch them suffering. I can hear people complain about the weather. We admire the students because they are having their summer holiday. Eat the water melon and staying at home watching the television. Enjoy the cool air machine, never worry about the job. Although I am staying at home, but I just can not stop. Yesterday I sleep at 3 am because ot the hot weather. And then get up at 8 o'clock. 5 hours in bed just because I can not sweat in my bed any more. My air machine is broken and I am not planning to fix it because that cost too much for the electric cost. 

Stil keep doing the sports these days. Yesterday night I can hear my heart beating very clearly. I know I am tired but when I set up my mind to do something I have to make it done perfectly. It is not about the thing , it is about the decision you have made. You have the responsibility to your decision. The moon light yesterday night is beautiful, it is in color silver like the silver color light over the sky. I enjoy my lonely days without anybody talking. Forget about me, I am quite fine than before.

Not a smoker but love the scene while the man smoking the cigarates.It is made by the movie. The man with one mature beard face and smoking the cigarates in the dark shadow night. The light of the cigarate light his face. The nose and the nice blue eyes. This kind scene can be seen in the movie but what I know smoking is bad for health though it is very cool. 

I used to smoke at the high school. At that time the school do not allow the students smoke. So we hide ourselves in the washroom. It smells bad in the washroom. But what we think it is cool to smoke like a man. Naive days of that age and we even do not know how important is the health and it do influence my score for the PE lesson. 

I can remember at that time I wear one misbhv sweatshirt with the yellow logo on my chest. We love the hip hop and even think that Wiz Khalifa smoking the grass is cool. Maybe being young we can never tell which is right or which is wrong.Any way I would just smile at the young one of myself. Looking at the old picture of mine. One young boy wearing one rock'n roll shirt standing right behind one tree.With one cigarate in my mouth and one over-sized glass on my face.Looks like one funny boy .Every time my friend would ask who is the one standing there. And after I tell them it was me they would laugh at him for almost 10 seconds. Any way it was the past already.

Growing up to a man is a good feeling. Enjoy the healthy life. I quit smoking since I gradauted from the high school. I would never say light me up bro any more.

Watching the film is another new way to escape from my life. We are dreaming we are one role in the movie and looking for ways to save this planet or fight against any kinds of evil people. People stand at the justice said act as a hero. But sometimes we are reluctant to help poor people sometimes. When some one fall down in the street, when some people even can not afford a piece of bread.We are just so numb with our numb face. If one day when we have become the status of theirs, would we feel sad if we see so many stony faces?

My family used to be in a huge trouble in the business. Ath that time the whole family have to get away from the town I grown up. At that time anyone who have given us any help I would feel really grateful for that. But there are still someone have the numb sight in their eyes. My tears run down because I am just too weak for changing that. I get away from the school and from then on my whole life have changed. Any way we should not be trapped by the past. But I can not forget the people who used to help and also can not forget the people who have never given any help and speak some cold words and hurt my whole family.

Life is always changing. I think I would help someone if they need the help. People should be nice to others. We earn our own respect. Numb people would never get any friends. I would try to help someone.

Yesterday night I have a nightmare. It is not the horror from the horror movies. It is the horror from the life. Imagine if one day you lose your money in the bank and you can not afford your food. You have to sell the furniture to make you live in this city. And I believe the stress of the life is more powerful than any other monster in the movie. And I am having the nightmare about that. Feel the life have no hope any more. Unemployed make you can not make a step in this city. The summer's temperature would almost kill you. The stress of the life make people feel crazy. And I am not feel well and it make me sweat all my body. This is my nightmare. 

We should feel grateful for the life we are having now. Forget about other things. When some day you just want to make your family eat enough food. That is the most difficult time for us. It is hard to accept it. But the nightmare bring me more stress indeed. These days I am worrying about the business. This is the last time I complain about my life. I would change it using all my hands. I would not sleep in the noon. And this is my promise. I would count on days. I would let people know my courage. I would conquer any kinds of trouble in front of me. Because I am who I am. I am the one who is in control. I would live my life in my own way. Say goodbye to the past. This is one new begining of my life.

25 years old man, think the sports just belong to the young student. Even while you are running on the road at this age people would think you are creepy.Sports have become one precious thing for us. It would take a lot of the time. Most of the time we are sitting on the chair. Work have become the most important part in our life. People complain about the salary but still keep working. It is one basic skill for living. All kinds of people in different zone. But we just spend too much time on working. We have forgotten when to do some sports. Sports is like the fuel for a engine. Most of the time after a hard day work you would feel tired. I have to climb six floors without the elevator. After reaching the house you feel extremely tired. But I remember while I was just a school boy I do not breath too much. I know the body is changing. But at the age of 25 I can not become one old man can hardly climb the floor.

It is just we have been staying on the chair of too long. The legs is grow fatter and powerless. So after realize that I have been doing the sports for about 2 months. Things have changed. I am not too tired after climbing the floor any more. My arms grown stronger and the shoulder become wider even while wearing the clothing it looks much better expecially in summer while wearing the t-shirts.Being a sportsi man wearing the t-shirts should be one of our pride.

Stronger ,faster and higher. Always remember the function of the sports. We would be much better if keep doing the sports. It is the fuel of our life.

Standing right edge of the building. I used to sit at this edge at the building at the age of 16. It was one winter night , the cold wind is blowing me up.I lie on the top of the building listening to the wind wisper in my ears. I want to escape from many things. The shame on my face , I can not take it any more. I have the tears on my face. I run to the top of the building. Mother is right working right the other side of the road. She is running a small shop there. She is worrying about me. But the dark sky over my head seems trying to sallow all my hopes. At that time it is one darkest time in my life. I am trying to make myself look farer. But the only thing in front of me is I am standing right on the top of the building.One line of lyrics make me remind me I wish I cound fly, way up in the sky , like a bird so high . I might just try. But some love trapped me. I know at that time both the parents suffering for the life. When I get down the building mother is still sitting in the shop. And she never know I have considered to jump off the building right in front of her. I do not want to hurt her. These days I am facing the same questions. I am feeling disappointed for all things. The dark sky over my head. I should never give up. I keep warning myself. But things crack down like you can hardly hold. I have to say see you tomorrow. Maybe I would see your tomorrow. God let me get through today.

Standing right edge of the building. I used to sit at this edge at the building at the age of 16. It was one winter night , the cold wind is blowing me up.I lie on the top of the building listening to the wind wisper in my ears. I want to escape from many things. The shame on my face , I can not take it any more. I have the tears on my face. I run to the top of the building. Mother is right working right the other side of the road. She is running a small shop there. She is worrying about me. But the dark sky over my head seems trying to sallow all my hopes. At that time it is one darkest time in my life. I am trying to make myself look farer. But the only thing in front of me is I am standing right on the top of the building.One line of lyrics make me remind me I wish I cound fly, way up in the sky , like a bird so high . I might just try. But some love trapped me. I know at that time both the parents suffering for the life. When I get down the building mother is still sitting in the shop. And she never know I have considered to jump off the building right in front of her. I do not want to hurt her. These days I am facing the same questions. I am feeling disappointed for all things. The dark sky over my head. I should never give up. I keep warning myself. But things crack down like you can hardly hold. I have to say see you tomorrow. Maybe I would see your tomorrow. God let me get through today.